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Give me Liberty, and a Corvette

It was a great idea. It seemed a shame for him to rent a
house when I had an extra bedroom and was approaching
the age where it would be nice to have a “man of the
house” to lock up at night, take the trash out, change the
oil in my car, and bring me a Pepsi from the fridge. So my
unmarried son moved in. Another son lives across the
street, too, and I could visualize wonderful family meals and
a card game or two once in a while.

I was not surprised when my boarder came home one day
all excited about an amazing deal on a car. He has always
loved cars. I could have guessed that he was preparing me
for the news that he had already bought it.
“But you already have a car,” I said.
“I know Mom, but this is a Jeep…a Liberty.”
That meant nothing to me. Cars are used to get people to
Bingo and back. One is all you need. I have my own car
and he doesn’t play the game, so I wasn’t impressed till he
added that, with a couple hundred bucks, he could bring it
up to code and double his money. No one complained
when he parked it on the grass three years ago. It is still
there along with another Jeep Liberty he found and had to
buy because it has good parts on it. I fussed a bit, but he
was persuasive.

“It will save me a fortune in parts,” he explained.
Slowly I realized that maybe the return to the nest wasn’t
the brilliant idea I thought it was. I don’t remember when or
how he parked a station wagon on the back lot. When I
asked him about it, he said, “Oh that. That’s where I store
all my tools and stuff.”
I began pointing out cert
ain rental properties in the newspaper. I even circled some
in red crayon. If he noticed he never mentioned it.
Gradually I began fussing about all these cars in my yard.
All he could say was, “where am I going to park my
Corvette when winter comes?” I just came right out and
said it, “Park it and all your cars in your own yard when you
get moved.”

That did it, or so I thought. He promised that all of these old
cars would be gone at the end of the month. That was
three months ago.

Right now they are all for sale: two Jeeps, a Corvette and a
little station wagon. I don’t think he really wants to part with
any of them, especially the silver, low mileage, four cylinder
sedan he brought home yesterday.
“Think of the gas money I will save driving back and forth
to work,” he said.
If I ever get my lawn back, I plan to install a ten-foot high
chain link fence around the perimeter of my yard and keep
it locked. It’s the only solution. My heart won’t let me kick
him out. He turns back my bed covers in the evening and
gives me a gentle back rub. He doesn’t mind vacuuming,
loves to cook and shop for groceries. And it’s OK with him
that I share his story.